![[info]](http://l-stat.livejournal.com/img/userinfo.gif){kind=small}
It's madah's 21st birthday todayy!
BAPPY HIRTHDAY TO YOU MY DEAR!
mwahh~! (((:
- Mood:
partayyy! but peacefully.
I see the light now! YZ was just telling us how the uni does not condone or encourage (to put it nicely) blatant blind memory work and "model answers". But isn't that what most mods teach us anyway? The fact that we've all been trained to memorise or remember the "correct" answer since primary school shows that we're but the blind leading the blind. But but but but uni also does not show where we went wrong. Sure, it's one thing to know the right answer, but it's another thing to know where exactly our mistakes lie in. If we're blind to memorisation of the perfect answers, and still get it wrong anyway or don't understand, we've not learn much have we?
Damn you, education system. Makes people like me (who memorise without internalising) feel so vulnerable and unworthy.
OK well this is like a short break in the hiatus period. Oopsie. I AM BACK TO STUDYING. BUHBAI now.
On a happier note, 3 fiction books for $15. SCORRRRE. Sigh, you gotta love sales XD
I can't do this anymore.
Why is what I do never enough?
Maybe I'm not meant to be here at all.
Just lost whatever little ounce of confidence I have.
):
What is the worst that could happen today?
Well, I got caught in the bus. Like in between the doors. ZOMG it's freaking embarrassing la. I was there running for the bus, but hey it wasn't like I was a feet away from the last person who boarded it; I'm pretty sure the driver could've spotted me in the side mirror. When I got on the step (just barely the first), the doors closed on me. Giapped (Kiapped?). Tercepit. Piégé. Trapped. 3 seconds. Or more. EEEEEEEE WHERE TO HIDE MY FACE NOW? MY WATER FACE DROPP
Sigh. Anyway well done I'm multi-tasking. Was supposed to start on my other 2 paper thingies...but I ended up looking through...stuffs. Fundraising's going ok, steadily. I was rather surprised that I sold a bear to the Vice-Dean (or so I think). VD yo. Hahahahah. He's super nice la, I think people with compassion make good managers. At least on the welfare part. Heh. But so tiring this fundraising..it's like recruitment drive and career talk sign-ups all over again, but this time we're just collecting money for other people. Baaah. I've a good mind to post something veh long about this Zoe Project that killed almost 993 students. Haha but wait for it. It's gonna come. :D
Anyway speaking of face surgery, was reading the news today about this plastic surgeon who got fined for injecting sheep foetal cells into people's skins. EWWW. But hey the doctor is fine-looking! He looks charming, but he's quite a controversy...got that bad boy streak la. Apparently stem cell is still in the clinical trial stage (RMB MADA>>>DRUGS AND SOCIETY!), so whatever he's doing or whatever he claims he's got training in, still warrants more research, hence the fine. Hahahaha. Still got time to pose for the papers some more lolll. Wonder if his licence will be revoked...hmmm. Third time's a charm maybe?
I am so amused that my dentist admires my necklace which he calls a brooch. HEHEHE. It's a good distraction for him; maybe I should wear it more often? Teehee.
HURRRRRR my happiness is short-lived these days. I think I want Meiji's milk chocolate. -pouts-
Guess what just came in the mail? :DD
Yeayy my new iTouch!!! Belatedbelatedbelated birthday present actually, I took forever to procrastinate and finally decided to order online because there's free engraving hohohoho. I actually wrote my own birthday message, can you believe it? -.-" lol. But Dad's paying for it, so thank you sooo much! Did a mini poll on FB and turns out that a lot of people are in favour of iTouch so I decided to get it instead of the classic one. Ehehehe.
And wahlao they cheat me la. Said that the product is made from China, but the idea was from California or some sort and that it would be delivered by 8 Oct (that's Thursday) so I faithfully waited since it was my free day anyway. God my heart was doing star jumps at every moment I hear some van-ish noise. But the day came and went, and still no iPod ): So then Friday came, and I intelligently found out how to track my package, and it turned out that my iPod has only just arrived at the delivery facility that morning. Then I had school so I didn't and couldn't waste my time anymore waiting for Mr. DHL to come, so I didn't bother la. I MISSED MR DHL EXPRESS. But good thing my mom was around to receive the package. AWESOMMME. :))
So anyway my engraving reads "Happy LEGENDARY 21st. ilyana" taking inspiration from the ever so funny NPH from HIMYM cos he's brilliant like that. I did consider his other tag lines like "SUIT UP!" and "It's gonna be...wait for it...le-gen-dary" hahahaha but no space la. The engraving is so pretty, I like! Couldn't take a decent picture of it due to some reflection at the back, but it's superawesome I'm in awe.
I chose the 32GB cos I wanted more space for songs and ahem, videos so wheeee~ my train rides will never be the same again! :D It's so slim and smooth I'm really terrified that my hands would somehow let it slip (choy). >__< I feel so noobish now, especially since it's my first Apple product.
My iTouch has a name! I think I'll be giving my mp3 to either my dad or my mom (heheh). I will defo miss it cos it's my first ever mp3 that accompanied me through my A Levels and half of my uni education, but the iTouch is here to stay. *blinks*
And wahlao they cheat me la. Said that the product is made from China, but the idea was from California or some sort and that it would be delivered by 8 Oct (that's Thursday) so I faithfully waited since it was my free day anyway. God my heart was doing star jumps at every moment I hear some van-ish noise. But the day came and went, and still no iPod ): So then Friday came, and I intelligently found out how to track my package, and it turned out that my iPod has only just arrived at the delivery facility that morning. Then I had school so I didn't and couldn't waste my time anymore waiting for Mr. DHL to come, so I didn't bother la. I MISSED MR DHL EXPRESS. But good thing my mom was around to receive the package. AWESOMMME. :))
So anyway my engraving reads "Happy LEGENDARY 21st. ilyana" taking inspiration from the ever so funny NPH from HIMYM cos he's brilliant like that. I did consider his other tag lines like "SUIT UP!" and "It's gonna be...wait for it...le-gen-dary" hahahaha but no space la. The engraving is so pretty, I like! Couldn't take a decent picture of it due to some reflection at the back, but it's superawesome I'm in awe.
I chose the 32GB cos I wanted more space for songs and ahem, videos so wheeee~ my train rides will never be the same again! :D It's so slim and smooth I'm really terrified that my hands would somehow let it slip (choy). >__< I feel so noobish now, especially since it's my first Apple product.
My iTouch has a name! I think I'll be giving my mp3 to either my dad or my mom (heheh). I will defo miss it cos it's my first ever mp3 that accompanied me through my A Levels and half of my uni education, but the iTouch is here to stay. *blinks*
Can I ask why...you have to pity me?
Am I that vulnerable to you?
Am I that vulnerable to you?
- Mood:
pissed off
YEAY I can finally take a break cos my midterms are over~!
I realise that I haven't updated about my Raya stuff! Well, it's been a rather quiet affair this year, I'm not going out much to visit my relatives, partly because I'd rather use the time to study and work on my papers. Did I tell you that on the first day my mom cooked crabs? HAHA. Yes there was the usual ketupat and other traditional dishes, but she also added crabs. lol. I'm not complaining! Cos I love them, messy as eating them can be. But what I like most about Raya (apart from the money) is the sampling of kuihs and cookies at other people's house. I am really missing kuih sarang semut (kuih ant's nest). My mom used to make them when we were younger and they were a sellout. But sadly, not many people make them anymore, so I really wonder if I'll get to see them again. sniffs. The first thing I'll do when I learn to bake (hohoho) is to get the recipe from my mom and try it ((((:
Anyway, I've also taken a liking to taking photos from my phone's camera! I don't take pictures much from my phone, because well, it's a phone. But I like its features cos it's really cool. They were taken when I was learning about learning :P and I/O Psych. My computer's really sot already la! I'MTAKINGFOREVERTOTYPE because it only types every other letter and I always have to backspace delete and type all over again. UGH. *pulls hair* Not all the pictures are here of course, LJ's being selective today IWONDERWHY.
I realise that I haven't updated about my Raya stuff! Well, it's been a rather quiet affair this year, I'm not going out much to visit my relatives, partly because I'd rather use the time to study and work on my papers. Did I tell you that on the first day my mom cooked crabs? HAHA. Yes there was the usual ketupat and other traditional dishes, but she also added crabs. lol. I'm not complaining! Cos I love them, messy as eating them can be. But what I like most about Raya (apart from the money) is the sampling of kuihs and cookies at other people's house. I am really missing kuih sarang semut (kuih ant's nest). My mom used to make them when we were younger and they were a sellout. But sadly, not many people make them anymore, so I really wonder if I'll get to see them again. sniffs. The first thing I'll do when I learn to bake (hohoho) is to get the recipe from my mom and try it ((((:
Anyway, I've also taken a liking to taking photos from my phone's camera! I don't take pictures much from my phone, because well, it's a phone. But I like its features cos it's really cool. They were taken when I was learning about learning :P and I/O Psych. My computer's really sot already la! I'MTAKINGFOREVERTOTYPE because it only types every other letter and I always have to backspace delete and type all over again. UGH. *pulls hair* Not all the pictures are here of course, LJ's being selective today IWONDERWHY.
(this was taken using the emboss feature :DD)
And I'm missing all you guys from overseas! Especially the one reading this blog. HEEEE. Hope you're having funnnn travelling and shopping! And that you miss me too. :D
Just waiting for some good news.
OK need to go get ready now. GOODBYEEE.
I always hate speaking up in class. And it makes a whole lot of difference especially when your participation is taken into account for grading. There's this fear that what comes out of my mouth is gonna sound so stupid in comparison with the rest who sound so intellectual and like they actually do read their stuff (of course they do! duh). I have been trying my best to give my input just for the sake of that 15%, but still...I'm crippled by the fact that I refuse to share my knowledge, or lack thereof. And there always seem to be some people who want to speak up more because they want to maximise their own 15%, and not letting others have their say. shrugs. Maybe I should start off by asking questions instead of trying to lead the discussion with my intellectual insight. And I'd rather to contribute to group discussions instead.
I am thinking alot more about what I'm learning now. At least my mind tries to work during group discussions. Heh.
Ahbooooo.
I am thinking alot more about what I'm learning now. At least my mind tries to work during group discussions. Heh.
Ahbooooo.
Hey.
Here's a reminder to myself: If it's meant to be, it's meant to be. If not, tant pis! C'est pas grave. I just need to make sure that I don't jump the gun too soon, lest I will feel more disappointed and crushed.
OK! After my paper is done, I really need to catch up on the backlog of readings. And study for midterms. HRMMMM.
Allez-allez vites vites y'all!
Balik kampong now~ Soooo exciting!
It's been a long time since I laughed quite hard. Thanks Chuck! LOVVVEEE YOOOU.
Toutes les choses françaises et la famille de Montpellier. Ils me manquent. Tout à coup, les souvenirs me rappelent de temps quand je suis restée dans la maison de Joelle et Martin, avec leur enfants Emma et Louka qui sont adorables. Je peux me rappeler beaucoup de choses avec qui on se passe les temps. Je voudrais reviendre à Montpellier ou Paris un jour. Absolument, c'est exact!
Ça, c'est un grand désir. Est-ce que vous voulez me suivre?
/And this took me a lot of help from wordreference. lol.
OMO I need a break. Just so freaking tired. Today after lessons, went to AS7 and practically camped in front of the computer in an attempt to start on my paper. But ended up doing a lot of nonsense like printing..and waiting for the print job (actually more like the uncle who went off for lunch because the machine malfunctioned.) and...checking emails compulsively. Then I had a group meeting which turned out to be futile cos everyone was stoning and completely braindead. Went round and round one topic after another only to realise where are we going with this anyway? SIGH I hope next meeting will be better!
Then after meeting, I went to the library in an attempt to find books to help supplement my arguments in my paper. Only borrowed one. Was also contemplating whether to photocopy on the spot, but why waste money when you can bring the whole book home and digest it at your own sweet time?
Mondays-Wednesdays are the worst. I have to wake up pretty early to get to school, which means I have to sleep early as well. I HATE TUESDAYSSSSSSS. I need at least one cuppa coffee (this has only just entered into my vocabulary just recently!) so I can sustain through the first lecture. FIRST LECTURE ONLY KNOWWW. Then during mno which I lovelove, I will just concuss. Or stone.
Nobody replied my email! Is everyone sleeping on the job or what?! >:(
OK I am so hyperventilating on my first paper. I'm so excited yet nervous yet sleepy ALL at once! Bought chocolate to keep me happy. HOHO. And by the way, I made it through the day today! That's cos Sam and Rach, the lasts of my friends (ok..almost) have left! Which means I'm really trudging to school alone and I sat for lecture alone today ok. Stupid D overslept. *box* Well it's nice if you bump into me, but if you don't well then too bad.
It's so hard keeping track of 4 different groups la. Why do I always have to take the initiative? Oh wait I can answer that. BECAUSE I WANT TO DO WELLL! Gaaaaaaahhhhkkkkkkkk.
In other news, I HAS A NEW DISPLAY PICTURE! Always loved Edna Mode, she's so quirky. And my new DP for MSN is Russell, rotund boy scout from UP. lol. I am reliving whatever Disney/Pixar cartoon fantasies from yesteryear. HAHAHA. Cute what.
K break's over. in the jungle, the mighty jungle, the lion sleeps tonight.....rawrrr.
Do not confuse me with breakfast and break fast. Really got difference one ok, the most obvious being the timing (duhhhhhhh.). All it takes is just ONE SPACE.
I don't know why, but I just get supremely irritated when people cannot learn the difference. Of course they might be unintentionally doing it, but some people just refuse to learn lor. And then I would take it to mean that breakfast is breakfast when it actually comes to mean break fast. SO YAAAAAA CAN YOU ALL PLS TAKE NOTE. I AM DAMN PARTICULAR ABOUT THIS.
Suddenly I miss the way we started out during our very first meeting.
Do you remember?
How everyone was all raring to go, the kind of happy feeling you get when you're in a group of really good friends.
That was when we really believed.
At the end of the day, very few people remained. The same few.
And now, all will soon be gone.
What happened to us? Again there's no closure of some sort.
And you just sort of leave us hanging in the balance. Again and again. Not even having the guts to take up responsibility.
Sigh.
Wellll...I wish the new comm all the best. I really hope that since all of you are of the same batch, and have gone through so much together, you'll try to keep this friendship going even when it's put to the test.
I feel kinda sad/emo now. Haha. Maybe cos I feel unappreciated (o-m-g is someone's affect rubbing off on me?! 0.0), and I feel very invisible. Like nobody appreciates my efforts kinda thing? I don't want to complain la, and maybe it's a vicious cycle; I also used to dislike asking questions or approaching ppl I barely knew. shrugs. And no, I'm not boasting about what I've done (well what exactly have I done?), it's just...me, feeling blah all of a sudden. It's good la in a way I guess. Not the blah part. Heh. The part where I'm supposed to be freer. Now I've got more time to pursue what I want to do without actually having to worry about other commitments. :]
I feel like I can do more now, can concentrate on my studies.
I actually wanted to keep a key, but I felt bad imposing on them. Besides, it's their room (or store) now, not mine. What good is it if I come in and encroach on their space when I'm not going to do anything for the comm or whatever?
I think I want to hide in library nowwww. Hello new hideout.
Don't really know if I want to come out and socialise with the ppl (honestly, I really think I'm out of touch with them la. Just don't have that chummy feeling anymore.)
But anyway, thanks for the memories. Think I can finally let go now.
/edit: OMG Ko fi Annan is coming to Singapore to teach! How cool is that.
- Mood:wistful
Hello world.
I'm kinda excited to embark on my schoolwork right now, though I'm not sure how I'll fare. But I do know that I have to do my bestest to try my hardest so I can achieve what I hope to achieve at the end of the semester! *cross fingers* There's tonnes of readings to do, and I've been happily camping at the library photocopying stuff from RBR (yes. omg). Not sure that I'll read everything, but it's good to keep up with the readings and try to supplement them. I resolve to read all my readings before exams!!! :D Plus, there's an exciting project coming up for mno and I'm having mixed feelings about it, but hopefully it'll all turn out good! And that we'll actually be able to improve someone else's life (and with that, I have to shamelessly plug, whose life needs improving?! Heh.)
Can't really comment on my grpmates as of yet, so I shan't judge! But I'm hoping that they will all be cooperative so at least we can work on something great. I have like 4 projects to do la. ZOMMMGGG. I think I can just die. There's one research paper and one lab report as well.
OHH and kudos to me for speaking up! I think being alone in a tutorial does have its good points. Not that I'd say something useful or thought-provoking (HAHAH) but at least I took the initiative and that's the first step to getting my tutorial participation marks! Hoho. And then smartly, I spoke up in class but I forgot to hand in the required writeup for this tutorial -.-"
School's been kinda lonely. Permanent friends include Mada, Dennis and Berníce, then sometimes I'll see Germ, or Sam and Anna and Grace, Jannah, Mavis etc. But that's about it, cos I kinda want to get away from other people. IT'S OKAY, I'LL SURVIVE. Just wondering if I could sneak into the store and study for abit at times (hyukhyuk).
Sharing tmr. Strangely, I've not had any msn requests from the new comm. Just wondering if they do talk on msn, or they prob have no questions to ask me *shrug*. But I leave it up to them la, if they wanna add me or not. Cos I'm not going to! I feel like there's this generation gap lol even though I'm only about 2 years older than (or same age as) them, can't really relate to them (I don't know why!) but maybe cos they're not in my og or anything...but still. Hmm. I'd like to say I'm worried, but I think I'll always be there to help them (if they need me to). Just don't think I could stand being in the committee without any support from friends (as in they run together with me).
So...! Just to leave with this, David's (my lecturer) favourite word is "sarah". What's yours? Well for me, I don't think I have one just yet. (:
I realised that I lost my wisdom teeth.
*CRIES*
Watched abit of MJ performing his History world tour just now. I wonder why I don't have his songs on my mp3 haha cos when I watched him, it really took me back to the time where we used to watch Moonwalker and his other music videos. Then my dad said that he actually got to see MJ live in Singapore (!!!!) while he was on duty at the National Stadium. omg *faints* MJ is about the greatest superdupermegastar Singapore could ever lay her hands on. Heh. But ya la, so sad. I kinda liked him when he was at the Moonwalker (going white, but not too white) phase.
I hate being in this position. Where there's hardly any support from anyone I know.
Just. Freaking. Tired.
The more I hear about things, the more convinced I feel that I really can't take anyone on their words anymore...ironically. It's like...I'm getting bits and pieces here but somehow I can't seem to join them together to form a bigger picture. I feel like I'm missing out on something, like something just doesn't sit right, it never has (right from the beginning I think). Maybe it's too late to look back now and wonder if we could somehow turn things around. Maybe we should all have come in with no expectations, just expectations of our own. Maybe...a lot of maybes. But I'm tired. I don't want to think of this anymore. I don't want to compromise what I've set out to do. This year has got to be the most crucial year for me so I want to set things straight. I'm already spent. And I'd like to keep on the enthusiasm before crunch time comes and then I'll get cranky and stressed and all depressed. Which is not the point. The point is...I've learnt much and I'm going to take these lessons throughout my life from now on. But...this is as far as I can go. If somehow circumstances were a little different, then maybe I'd do things a little differently too. Trust me.
Ah ok anyway interesting tutorial today. I poked a snail. Like a real snail and OMG I'm damn grossed out. Our snail was very boring and it eats carrots. It ate quite a huge chunk, for sucha slow snail, the greedy pig. I think I'm ok with small snails but they're super slimy and just damn slow I think I underestimated their speed. So yep, spent much of my L&C tut observing a damn boring snail. I feel like a parent who's kinda depressed that her child (or snail) is like some introverted snail (or child) who refuses to socialise and be active. Whereas the pair next to us had a very active and curious snail. HAHAHA. I don't know if snails can habituate. Do they? I mean their movement is soooo slow it's kinda hard to tell whether it's really their reaction that's slow or they are subconsciously used to it. LOL.
OHH I/O is super boring leh. On the other hand, MNO is rather enjoyable. Though I'm not sure what we're learning. HAHAHA.
- Mood:
exhausted
What is up with psych modules and uneven classes? Too many friends liao. HAHAHAHA.
Haiii. Damn stressed. Am I the only one who cares? Or is it under circumstance that I'm being forced to care? But it shouldn't be right. I'm genuinely concerned. HEEELLLLLPPPPP. Plus, I'm too tired to want to care ):
HAIIII. Stressed.
